


i'd be an anchor but i'm scared you'd drown

by sweetheartbitterheart



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Insecurity, Mutual Pining, Porn with Feelings, Sansa knows what's up, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-27
Updated: 2020-06-27
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:13:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24945172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetheartbitterheart/pseuds/sweetheartbitterheart
Summary: "I, uh, had a date," she doesn't know why she's admitting this to Theon Greyjoy, her best friend's brother's best friend of all people. They are loose acquaintances, if anything, always two ships passing by each other in the Stark household.His eyebrows shoot up and his smirk gets even more smarmy. "Good for you, Poole. Where's the lucky guy?""No clue. He stood me up."At that, the smirk falters on his lips. "Oh, shit."Suddenly, Jeyne finds herself embarking on some strange friendship with Theon Greyjoy.a modern au where Jeyne and Theon become friends and slowly fall in love
Relationships: Theon Greyjoy/Jeyne Poole
Comments: 9
Kudos: 51





	i'd be an anchor but i'm scared you'd drown

**Author's Note:**

> i just love theon and jeyne so much and want them both to be happy
> 
> title from Talk! by The 1975

It starts like this; May, finals are over, and Jeyne's been stood up by one of the Umber boys.

She's feeling like an idiot, stumbling over her shoes (heels borrowed from Myranda Royce last minute), writing a text to Sansa, when she bumps into someone. Strong arms stop her from nearly hitting the floor. There's apologies and excuses already falling out of her mouth before she makes eye contact with the guy pulling her up.

She sees the stupid kraken tattoo on his forearm just as he starts speaking.

"Oi, Poole! You should be more careful," Theon Greyjoy is telling her, perpetual laughter in his voice.

Heat rises to her cheeks, the embarrassment twisting knots in her stomach.

He's still as handsome as ever, all lean and tall and smirky, and Jeyne is suddenly transported back to the start of puberty when she and Sansa used to gossip about all the girls who were seen hanging around Theon, about how good he supposedly was in bed. She inadvertently finds herself blushing even more.

The pub is crowded, bodies pushing into one another, pressing Jeyne right into Theon's broad chest. He smells like cigarettes and alcohol and something else minty. She takes a small step back so she can look up at him, keep eye contact, maybe try to salvage some dignity, and maintain control.

He tilts his head to one side and asks, "What are you doing here? Sansa with you?"

"No. I, uh, had a date," she doesn't know why she's admitting this to Theon Greyjoy, her best friend's brother's best friend of all people. They are loose acquaintances, if anything, always two ships passing by each other in the Stark household.

His eyebrows shoot up and his smirk gets even more smarmy. "Good for you, Poole. Where's the lucky guy?"

"No clue. He stood me up."

At that, the smirk falters on his lips. "Oh, shit."

Jeyne nods, "Yeah."

"I think that definitely deserves a drink," he declares and before she can respond Theon is already turning back to the bar and flagging down the bartender. A few moments later Jeyne is handed a shot of vodka and Theon clinks his own against hers. "Cheers!"

They spend the rest of the night getting absolutely wasted. It's the most fun Jeyne's had in ages.

-

Suddenly, Jeyne finds herself embarking on some strange friendship with Theon Greyjoy.

Her closest friends, especially Sansa and Alys Karstark, are beyond baffled.

Sansa keeps giving Jeyne these little teasing smiles that only make her clench her jaw. Alys just keeps laughing.

"Theon? Really?" Sansa just keeps repeating.

Jeyne can only sigh, "Yes, really, Theon."

Two nights after that one out at the pub, Jeyne received a text from an unknown number that read: _Still hungover, Poole?_

She doesn't know exactly how Theon got her number but she is still so weirdly pleased by the fact that he did. He mostly sends her ridiculous observations he makes or strange things he believes his neighbors are up to (really if Theon thinks they're growing weed maybe he should just ask). Occasionally Jeyne gets sent a random string of emojis she has to decipher. Honestly, most of his texts make her laugh.

She tries to explain this to Sansa but she doesn't seem to really understand, like she can't fathom Jeyne having a closer friend than Sansa herself. Especially when it's someone they've both known since childhood.

But it seems like Sansa isn't gonna let it go so easily. "This isn't about you having a crush on him when we were 13?"

Jeyne is impressed by the fact that she only blushes a little. "No, Sansa. God, that was forever ago! I also had a huge crush on Beric Dondarrion for like 3 years but I got over that," she says with amusement.

Sansa nods but there's still this teasing gilt in her eyes that Jeyne bristles at.

-

Still Jeyne's heart does a weird little flip when Theon asks about the guy who stood her up, he finishes his text with the angry face emoji.

She texts back with reassurance that she doesn't care, she barely knew the guy and wasn't that interested.

Theon's response is a casual _'If you say so, Poole'_ and the relief Jeyne feels is overwhelming. 

She wants to keep this conversation lighthearted. If she thinks too hard about how many times a guy has stood her up or left her on read or only flirted with her to ask for Sansa's number, she'll start crying and won't stop.

Jeyne desperately doesn't want Theon to know that. He already caught her in a pathetic situation. She couldn't handle him feeling any more pity for her.

-

Theon is unable to really explain why he gets such a thrill from teasing Jeyne Poole.

Bumping into her had been a surprise but it also loosened something in his chest. She is older now and still pretty (she had always been pretty but she had also always been his best friend's little sister's friend, so in other words off limits) and completely unfazed by his taunting. She's as bubbly as ever, talking with her hands constantly, and that only increased after several drinks.

Her hair is a lovely dark brown and shiny, and she always smells like jasmine and rose. Theon doesn't know if it's her perfume or shampoo but it drives him to distraction. Sometimes when she sits close to him, he wants to bury his face at the nape of her neck where the scent is the strongest.

That night at the pub when they were reacquainted and Theon tried to show Jeyne how to throw darts, he had to bite back the desire to kiss her and take her back to his place. He watched her go from nervous to incredibly talkative by the end of the night.

He'd only had to annoy Sansa a little bit to get Jeyne's number.

Sure, he thinks about kissing Jeyne, the sounds she'd make and the feel of her hands on him, about running his hands through her long hair. But then he remembers she's known him since before puberty. He remembers all the times her and Sansa giggling at him, Robb and Jon playing football in the Stark backyard.

He also remembers casually maneuvering her around the crowded Stark kitchen, he'd simply grabbed her by the waist and guided her towards the fridge so he could grab a plate from a cabinet and watched a bright red blush spread across her face. He'd thought nothing of it back then. He made lots of girls blush, intentionally and unintentionally.

Jeyne is probably the first woman he's ever truly been just friends with. He doesn't want to fuck that up.

-

Since dropping out of university and his father withholding his trust fund unless he either finishes school or joins the family business, Theon works part-time at a bar. He also runs errands for Asha and her various business ventures. He doesn't understand most of them and doesn't care to. Asha has never given him a straight answer anyway. He's enjoying his slacker status at the moment.

Robb doesn't get it and Theon's gotten over the point of trying to explain it to him. At least Theon was getting a break from his best friend's bemused looks this summer while Robb backpacked through Europe (he'd offer to pay Theon's way to come along with him but Theon couldn't handle anymore charity from the Starks).

Jeyne tutors during the summer. She hates it, as she is so fond of complaining to Theon, but it pays well.

He invites her out to the bar after one night and many, many texts about some brat who has been _'absolutely fucking awful! Theon, he's so rude, he called me a bitch twice and I had to just smile and pretend I didn't hear anything'_.

When Jeyne storms into the bar, he laughs at the angry look on her very pretty face.

She slams her hands on the bar, "Alright, I'm here, Greyjoy. I need a drink. Now."

He arches an eyebrow, "What'll it be, miss?"

The anger dissipates from her a little bit. She tilts her head to the side, "Something with vodka. Show me your bartending skills."

So he makes her several vodka cranberries and they talk shit about the kids she's tutoring.

When Theon's shift ends, they get something to eat at the diner across the street. They pick food off one another's plates and try to one up each other's worst dates (or in Theon's case, hook ups).

Walking to the train station, Theon watches Jeyne from the side, she's got a good buzz going and there's no longer that tight set to her jaw. If he were the romantic type, he might say she's glowing.

"Did you have fun?" he asks.

She turns and smiles at him, "I did."

"Really?"

She nods, "Truly."

"Well, I am the most fun and charming person you've ever met," he says, puffing out his chest. She gives him an incredulous look. "Oh, admit it! I totally am." He gives her his most dashing smile.

"I guess you're growing on me," she acquiesces and he beams, laughing with his mouth wide open.

"Like a fungus," she adds.

Theon mimes getting shot in the heart.

-

Summer is in full swing and Jeyne and Theon are still texting constantly and hanging out fairly regularly when Sansa pulls Jeyne aside one morning.

"Be honest with me, are you and Theon dating? Or hooking up?" The sincerity in Sansa's voice almost makes Jeyne laugh. Her best friend's face is so serious; her eyes full of concern and she's resting a gentle hand on Jeyne's arm.

Jeyne places both of her hands on Sansa's shoulders and says very clearly, "Theon and I are definitely not dating or hooking up."

Sansa opens her mouth again to speak but Jeyne swiftly cuts her off. "We're only friends," she pauses then adds, "We're basically just drinking buddies."

At that, Sansa smirks, "If you're sure, Jeyne."

She's very sure and tells her best friend exactly that.

But she also refrains from telling Sansa that despite her and Theon's platonic friendship Jeyne does spend an absurd amount of time thinking about his hands. It's just, they're big, and he's almost always fidgeting with something. A cigarette, a joint, a pen. Jeyne likes to watch him make drinks whenever she visits him when he's bartending.

-

Lately when they hang out Jeyne will start confessing the most random things to Theon. He thinks she's trying to get some sort of reaction out of him, but he's not sure what.

"I used to have a crush on you, you know," she tells him calmly.

He doesn't look up from his phone, "I know."

"Well, fuck me then, I guess."

A startled laugh bursts out of Theon. He just can't help but be amused whenever she swears. 

She gives him a good hard shove and he stumbles a bit.

He retaliates by tickling her sides.

-

They're splitting a bottle of whiskey, passing it back and forth as they sit on Theon's couch watching Love Island. Jeyne feels herself getting sleepy and it's just so easy to rest her head on Theon's shoulder. For a few seconds, he stiffens then relaxes back into the couch.

She sighs into his t-shirt, her eyes drooping. Soon enough her eyes are fully closed and sleep is gently pulling her under.

Faintly she hears a soft "Poole?"

She knows she should respond but she's so tired and has just gotten so comfy.

The last thing she feels before sleep fully claims her is a hand brushing through her hair.

-

Jeyne doesn't want to see Theon's eyes when she sleeps or feel his hands on her in her dreams. She doesn't want the memory of his touch that causes her sleepless nights, or his face to be what haunts her subconscious.

(It is. It is. It is.)

They never talk about the nights when Jeyne dozes off lying against Theon's side. It just happens. Jeyne wakes with a blanket over her and Theon makes her bad coffee in the morning.

-

Things come to a head on a Thursday night in mid-July when Theon gets a text from a co-worker that his _'cute friend (thought she was your gf??) is here with some guy and very drunk' _. He doesn't even think about it, he just makes his way over there.__

__He isn't sure exactly what he's expecting when he shows up but seeing a clearly drunk Jeyne draped across some guy causes a knot to grow in Theon's stomach._ _

__Her eyes shine so bright when they catch his. "Theon! You're here!" she exclaims, launching herself into his arms. Her own wrap tightly around his neck and he takes a deep breath of her jasmine scent._ _

__She smacks him on the chest, "I missed you. Where were you?"_ _

__Theon chuckles, "I don't work Thursdays, Jeyne, you know this." Her pout is the only response he gets._ _

__It only takes Theon promising to let Jeyne win Mario Kart if she agrees to leave the bar and get some rest. She's still clinging to him, all pressed up against his side, as they walk out into the warm summer night._ _

__In the Uber back to his place (he initially thought she'd want to go home but she told him she didn't want Sansa to lecture her for getting so drunk), Jeyne grabs his hand and laces her fingers with his. She holds their clasped hands up with such an intense expression on her face._ _

__"Your hands are so big," she whispers. Theon bites his lip and looks out the window._ _

__Theon is thankful that getting Jeyne inside his building and up the stairs turns out not to be a struggle, but that soon changes once they're inside his apartment._ _

__Jeyne is fed up, so she throws her arms back around Theon's neck when they're alone in his place. She giggles in his ear and rubs her pent up body against his, desperate for friction. He seems not to pick up on her flirting methods. But before Theon can disentangle them, she leans forward and kisses him quick on the mouth. It's uncoordinated, a bit sloppy, Jeyne feels lucky she actually touched his lips._ _

__A groan crawls its way out of Theon's mouth and his hands on her hips push her back a little. Jeyne's too drunk to decipher the look on his face so she just grips the hair at the nape of his neck. He groans again._ _

__"Jeyne, Jeyne, come on," his tone is placating and patronizing._ _

__She decides to play coy, "What?"_ _

__He gives her an unimpressed look and pulls her arms from around his neck but still holds onto her hands._ _

__"Why aren't we having sex?" she demands, and there's that little half-smile Theon makes every time she swears. Usually she'd roll her eyes at his reaction but she's drunk and frustrated and horny. "Why won't you fuck me, Theon?" She knows she's whining but she thinks they've been dancing around this entirely too long now._ _

__"Because you're spectacularly drunk, Jeyne," he tells her flatly._ _

__She pouts, "No, I'm not! I'm really not!"_ _

__He's shaking his head, "You are, Poole. Just sleep it off and we can forget about this whole night."_ _

__"No, don't call me Poole! You only call me Poole when you try to make space between us or some shit," she tells him, then the rest of what he said catches up to her brain, "Forget about it? I don't want that, and I don't think you do either, Greyjoy."_ _

__Jeyne is so riled up from Theon's ridiculous statements that she doesn't notice him guiding her towards the couch and getting her to sit down. She doesn't want to cry but she can feel some tears building behind her eyelids._ _

__Theon sets a glass of water on the sad excuse of his coffee table in front of her. He doesn't look angry or particularly annoyed, maybe a little sad, which only confuses Jeyne._ _

__"I don't…" she starts then stops, swallowing down the lump in her throat, "I don't understand you. What's wrong with me?" Her voice has gone all small and she hates it, hates how pathetic and needy it sounds, hates that she's definitely about to cry. It's not sexy. It won't make Theon want her more, if he did at all, when she had been so sure he really, truly did._ _

__"There's nothing wrong with you, Jeyne," he says, his voice small too._ _

__Theon lays her on out on his couch, makes sure she's comfortable and places a blanket over her. She's halfway to sleep when her head hits the pillow._ _

____

-

The thing is Theon has become hopelessly, desperately infatuated with Jeyne. He's gone from occasionally thinking about what it'd be like to kiss her to constantly dreaming about how her legs would feel wrapped around his waist. He thinks about pulling her into his lap and kissing up her neck leaving marks. He wonders what kind of sounds she'd make, if she'd moan loudly or bite her lip to stifle any noises. He wonders what she tastes like.

The other thing is he was pretty sure Jeyne didn't feel like that particular way towards him. He might've wanted that but he figured there was no chance. So with her getting drunk and coming onto him, he was too surprised and confused to react much. Plus she was completely wasted, which was a rare occurrence for her, and he was the only body near her.

Jeyne was already gone by the time Theon woke up that next morning. He sent her a text but got no response.

-

After her pathetic attempt to sleep with Theon backfires, Jeyne ignores him for about a week. When they finally hang out again, neither say anything about it. She pretends she's not hurt by it. Maybe it's better this way.

They fall back into a similar pattern. They drink, they joke, they watch bad reality TV. Sometimes Jeyne feels Theon's eyes on her when he thinks she's not paying attention. She doesn't know what that means. She wonders, she wishes, too afraid to really hope, but fuck, she really wants.

Theon brings her along to some club Asha has money wrapped up in. It's not exactly the sort of place the two of them hang out in together; with a lot darker lighting and loud beats for bodies to dance up against each other.

After a few drinks, Jeyne excuses herself from Greyjoy sibling bickering, which to them must be considered bonding, and makes her way to the dancefloor. She's only a little buzzed and it's nice to just dance and not think about anything. Her eyes slip shut at the sway of other bodies pulling her in. Jeyne has never thought she'd had much rhythm but when you've got a couple drinks in who cares.

Unaware of how long she's been out there, she jumps a little when firm hands hold her waist from behind.

"It's just me," Theon whispers in her ear, causing a shiver down her spine.

Jeyne tilts her head back, "Hi."

"Having fun?"

"Loads. Definitely more than you and Asha," she teases.

He laughs and his teeth nearly graze the shell of her ear. She holds back a whimper.

They've both stopped moving in the middle of the dancefloor. Jeyne spins around, accusing words on her tongue because Theon can't act like this if it means nothing, if it's not going lead anywhere. It's not fair.

Jeyne barely gets his name out before he's pressing a hard kiss on her lips. She sighs into it, leaving her mouth open for him to push his tongue in. It's a claiming kiss, all heat and passion and she clutches his shoulders to pull him closer.

"God, you have no idea," Theon groans, shifting to mouth along her neck, following the line of the tendon down to where it meets her shoulder.

"Wanted you for so long, ever since I first saw you again." Jeyne is about to protest, but Theon chooses that moment to bite down lightly before scraping his teeth back up her neck along that same tendon, causing her to lose all coherent thought.

They part with a soft noise. He pulls back almost reluctantly to look at her. One hand comes up to tuck back a strand of tousled hair and Jeyne flushes at the gesture.

He looks at her almost shyly now, "Come home with me?"

She pretends to think about it, "Only if you play nice."

"Ah, but where's the fun in that?" he teases with a devilish glint in his eyes.

-

This time when they get inside Theon's apartment, he's the one to kiss her first. He pushes her against the door and runs his mouth first across her mouth then down her throat.

"I'm a dick, I'm sorry," he says against her skin.

Jeyne hums in agreement, "I know."

"I wanted you, before and always. I'm an asshole but I wasn't gonna take advantage of you. You're Jeyne, you're lovely," he's rambling and her heart picks up at these small confessions.

She drags his head up from her neck, holds his face in her hands, and kisses him with all her pent up passion. "I like you so much," she pants into his mouth, "Theon, I want you to-" The rest of her sentence is lost as he nips her earlobe. 

He's pulling her clothes off and she's letting him. He's careful and meticulous about it. Soon enough, she's standing in front of him, completely bare. She makes a gesture to start removing his clothes but he's faster than her, slipping out of his own in record time. Jeyne hides a laugh behind her fingers. Theon only arches an eyebrow at her.

When they are both stripped bare is when the panic begins to set into her heart. She wants so much but does not know how to go about taking. He's looking and looking at her and she feels beautiful and desired. So she takes his hand and pulls him towards his bedroom.

He spends a long time kissing her, not only her mouth but her neck and stomach and thighs. Little nips and bites sending shockwaves of pleasure through her. He has a very talented mouth.

She whines his name as he presses a kiss just under her navel.

"Gonna get you good and ready, Jeyne," he promises, kissing her hipbone.

"Theon, please, please-" her pleas are lost when he begins licking a hot stripe from her opening to her clit. Her hips buck, surprised, and her hand flies to his hair. He smirks against her heat, his lips and tongue playing her like an instrument. His tongue is hot, slick, and he spears her with it before lapping gently at her slit.

This goes on for what seems like an eternity. An unexpected orgasm causing her to squeal and pull hard at his hair. It doesn't cool her desire. She still has an urgent need for him, wants to feel him better and closer.

"Come on, Theon, please," she's begging and she doesn't care.

He licks her clean and carefully kisses her thighs again.

Lifting his head from between her legs, he smirks, "Please what?"

"You know what," she tries to sound angry but she's still too weak-limbed to work up the energy. She knows he's trying to give off an unaffected air but he has her thighs in a tight grip and his pupils are definitely dilated. It's not fooling her at all.

She puts as much authority in her voice as she can muster post-orgasm when she says, "Fuck me, Greyjoy."

He laughs loud and unrestrained, "As my lady commands."

There's the sound of foil unwrapping then he's pressing in and all she can focus on is the heat of his palms sinking into her skin as she stretches around him. She lets out a gasp and he sighs, long and satisfied as he bottoms out. It's been some time since Jeyne has had sex and even longer since it was good sex. The same probably isn't true for Theon but she doesn't care, not when it feels so good, when he feels so good.

When he really starts moving, she scrambles to wrap her arms around his shoulders. Another one of Theon's laughs huffs at her ear. She wants to ask him what's so funny but his lips begin tracing the shell of her ear and he gives a particular hard thrust. All coherent thoughts leave her as a loud moan is pulled from her throat.

There's a familiar sparking heat growing in her gut as Theon keeps brushing at that wonderful bundle of nerves inside her.

Her nails are digging into his shoulders leaving little crescent marks behind. All Jeyne can think is that she needs him closer, inside and all around her. Their skin is beginning to stick and catch with sweat. Theon hitches her legs a little higher, slipping inside a little deeper. Jeyne moans much louder this time, eyes falling closed in pleasure.

"I'm so close," she whispers, mouth catching on his chin.

It's when she reopens her eyes that Jeyne realizes Theon has had his eyes open and trained on her this whole time. The look on his face is soft and full of something else she can't decipher. His mouth has barely left her skin since they began, marking her lips and chin and throat. Now that they're both growing close, he recaptures her mouth and kisses her long and deep. She clenches down, throwing a leg around his waist and marvels at the surprised look on his face.

"Minx," he teases.

Gearing up for a comeback, Jeyne doesn't notice Theon's hands sliding down her body to tease her clit. She moans and almost tries to wriggle out of his grasp but it just feels too good. It's hard for her to think, to wade through the haze of her own pleasure combined with his smug satisfaction and unrestrained need flooding her senses.

Her voice is close to hoarse now as she whines yet again, "Theon, please."

His pace speeds up, the pressure inside and between them building. Jeyne tugs him closer, bringing their foreheads together, their breath mingling. She's breathless and weak-limbed, the coil in her lower belly tightening as her body tenses, and he nibbles at her jaw to send her over the edge, her body shaking as she moans his name. She goes boneless, her limbs suddenly heavy with the pulse of pleasure-pain shooting like bolts of lightning through her body.

Jeyne barely notices Theon finishing close after her, too hot and sated, but the sensation of him pulling out brings her a little closer to reality. He doesn't stray far, simply lies down beside her close enough that their skin still touches. His hands stay curled about her hips.

As more time passes, the two of them lying together in the quiet, Theon's touches grow bolder. A hand on her hip rubs circles then starts tracing patterns along her side while his other hand moves to her nape of her neck, gently scratching at the hairs there. It feels nice, so nice that Jeyne doesn't know how to react, even if her slowly building blush is giving her away.

But this is something they both wanted. It seems as though their newfound friendship was always going to lead them here in bed together. She turns to face him and nuzzles his cheek with her nose. His hand on her nape tightens a little and she shivers.

"That was fun," he says, voice a bit raspy and his eyes full of mirth. She can't really see his smile but she knows that he is.

"Very," she agrees. Shyly reaching out, she roams her hands over his chest. She rolls her eyes at the sight of his ridiculous tattoos, making a mental note to ask him about them later.

Slowly but surely, their bodies become closer once more. Lying on their sides, legs entangled, her face burrowed under his jaw, lips pressed right against his pulse point. His big hands warm the expanse of her back.

Jeyne is close to falling asleep when Theon shifts a little and drops a kiss to her hairline. She's even more startled when he starts to speak.

"I'm so happy you were stood up that night," he admits in a whisper. His voice so soft, so full of admiration and awe.

Warmth blossoms in her chest. "Me too," she whispers back.

-

Theon can't believe he gets to have this with someone, with Jeyne, who is sweet and funny and actually cares for him. She's the only one who understands the displaced feeling of having a best friend who shines brighter and bigger than you, the only one who knows the peculiar feeling of both loving the Starks and resenting them at the same time. They are a mismatched pair but Theon finds himself content and warmed by having her beside him.

He tells her he loves her barely three weeks after they first have sex. She's beginning to doze on his shoulder and it's like his heart is suddenly seized with love so he has to get it out.

"I love you," the words are loud in the quiet apartment.

He feels her body stiffen momentarily and then she's sitting up and climbing into his lap, wrapping her body around his.

"I love you too," Jeyne says, brown eyes alight with joy.

Theon laughs and presses his face to the nape of her neck, breathing in that jasmine and rose scent.


End file.
